There’s a version of you that learned how to survive by becoming smaller.
Quieter.
Easier.
Less emotional.
Less visible.
And if you grew up in a critical or narcissistic environment, that version of you wasn’t wrong.
It was protective.
But what once kept you safe… may now be keeping you small.
What Does It Mean to Take Up Space?
Taking up space isn’t about ego.
It’s not about being louder than everyone else.
And it’s not about being physically “big” in body size.
It’s about ending the habit of shrinking your personality, your needs, or your physical presence just to make other people comfortable.
It’s about permission.
Permission to:
- exist fully
- express honestly
- have needs without shame
- be seen without shrinking
Taking up space means you no longer:
- make yourself smaller in conversations
- hold back your truth to avoid discomfort
- minimize your presence to fit into someone else’s expectations
The opposite of shrinking is expansion.
And expansion isn’t about becoming more than you are—
It’s about finally allowing yourself to be all that you already are.
Psychological & Emotional Expansion
This is where taking up space truly begins—internally.
- Owning Your Worth:
Recognizing that you have just as much right to be here, speak, and have needs as anyone else. - Unapologetic Existence:
Letting go of unnecessary apologies for your feelings, thoughts, or presence. - Assertiveness:
Speaking your truth without over-explaining or trying to make it more palatable for others. - Setting Boundaries:
Protecting your time, energy, and emotional space—even when it feels uncomfortable.
Physical Presence & Body Language
Your body reflects what you believe about yourself.
When you’ve learned to shrink, your body often follows.
Taking up space physically can look like:
- Open Posture:
Shoulders back, chest open, sitting fully in your space. - Relaxed Body Language:
Allowing your body to exist comfortably instead of tightly contained. - Eye Contact & Presence:
Looking up, engaging, and allowing yourself to be seen. - Occupying the Room:
Walking into spaces without trying to disappear or stay on the edges.
Mindset
Taking up space requires a shift in how you see yourself.
- From Background Character → Main Character:
You stop living your life as if you’re secondary to everyone else. - From Convenience → Authenticity:
You prioritize being real over being “easy” or “low maintenance.” - From Playing Small → Expressing Fully:
You stop dimming your light to make others comfortable.
Why You Learned to Make Yourself Small
This didn’t come from nowhere.
You may have learned to shrink because:
- your emotions weren’t validated
- your needs felt like a burden
- expressing yourself led to conflict or rejection
- being “too much” had consequences
So your nervous system adapted.
Shrinking became safety.
But what protected you then…
is no longer required now.
Taking Up Space in Everyday Life
Expansion doesn’t have to be dramatic.
It starts in small, intentional moments:
- Saying what you actually want
- Not apologizing when you’ve done nothing wrong
- Letting silence exist without rushing to fill it
- Sharing your opinion honestly
- Saying “no” without over-explaining
Small shifts create powerful change.
The Discomfort of Expansion
Taking up space can feel uncomfortable at first.
You might feel:
- guilt
- anxiety
- fear of judgment
- fear of being “too much”
This doesn’t mean you’re doing it wrong.
It means you’re doing something new.
Taking Up Space Is Healing
Every time you choose not to shrink:
- You are rewiring your patterns
- You are building self-trust
- You are teaching your body it is safe to be seen
This is what healing looks like in real life.
Tapping Into the Inner Lion
There is a part of you that already knows how to take up space.
It doesn’t question itself.
It doesn’t shrink to be accepted.
It doesn’t look around the room to decide if it’s “allowed” to exist fully.
It simply is.
Think of a lion.
A lion does not walk into a space wondering:
- “Am I too much?”
- “Should I be quieter?”
- “Do I need to make others more comfortable?”
The lion doesn’t ask for permission to exist.
The lion doesn’t shrink its presence to make others feel bigger.
The lion takes up space because it knows who it is.
And that same energy exists within you.
Not as arrogance.
Not as force.
But as grounded, unwavering presence.
Tapping into your inner lion means:
- standing in your truth without needing approval
- allowing yourself to be seen without apology
- trusting that your presence is enough
You don’t have to become someone else.
You just have to stop silencing the part of you that already knows how to stand fully in who you are.
A Gentle Invitation to Expand
You don’t have to go from small → fully expressed overnight.
Start here:
- Where am I still shrinking?
- What would it look like to take up just 5% more space today?
Maybe that looks like:
- speaking once when you normally wouldn’t
- holding eye contact a little longer
- not apologizing unnecessarily
Expansion happens in small, brave moments.
Final Truth
Taking up space isn’t something you earn.
It’s something you remember.
Because the version of you that is confident, expressive, and fully alive…
has always been there.
Picture by Pixabay
